Hamburger: The Motion Picture

Russell Proco (played by McCloskey) has been expelled from multiple schools because of his crude behavior, namely his Lothario ways in having women throw themselves at him (even when he is in no mood). He was given a large trust fund, but his grandfather's will stipulated that it is frozen unless he earns a college diploma. While trying to mull over his problem at a local Busterburger (while having to say no to the overly friendly attractive cashier) owned by a friend of his, who said he had a similar problem and that he earned the equivalent of a college diploma after finishing Busterburger University. Russell agrees that this may be his way to get the trust fund unfrozen.

After signing up, Russell runs afoul of Drootin (Dick Butkus), a vicious teacher whose job is to ensure that improper franchise owners will flunk out. Drootin imposes three rules on all the candidates: (1) Outside consumption of food is prohibited. (2) All candidates are to remain on the grounds of Busterburger University until graduation. (3) Since sex and success make lousy partners, all candidates are not to engage in sex while students.

Russell tries to focus on work and to steer clear of his zany classmates, among them a fellow horndog who lusts after the CEO's trophy wife, a nun, an obese man who shocks himself to avoid overeating, a sex-crazed female guerrilla from Central America, as well as a black pop musician named Magneto Jones (Chip McAllister) who is kidnapped by police and brought to Busterburger University in handcuffs, in order to improve minority imaging. However, Russell finds himself attracted to another teacher, Mia Vunk (Debra Blee), who is the CEO's daughter and is dating Drootin. When Drootin learns of a rival suitor, he makes it a priority to drum out Russell. After being caught off campus, Drootin punishes Russell by having special sauce dumped on him while being made to listen to the company's jingle several times.

The film is perhaps best known for Charles Tyner's character, Lyman Vunk, the founder and CEO of Busterburger, who utters the phrase "Put those cookies back, motherfucker," and for his voluptuous trophy wife (Randi Brooks).

Russell manages to pass the first part of the final test, an oral exam conducted by Lyman Vunk and the teachers, and must now pass the second part, whereupon all the candidates will be made to manage Busterburger for one day. Drootin makes sure Russell and everyone fails by first getting an eating club of obese people to the Busterburger, who will probably exhaust all the food reserves. Russell uses explosive means to dispose of them, then Drootin hijacks the drive-thru intercom to insult a black motorcycle policeman's race and profession, who drives off enraged as he was simply trying to grab lunch at Busterburger. A biker girl makes a pass at Russell, who refuses this but is mistaken by her boyfriend, who gets his gang to smash up the restaurant. A bunch of black cops arrive, not to arrest the bikers but also to take part caused by Drootin's earlier instigation. To underscore, Drootin attempts a cornfield meet with a poultry truck, who swerves into the ruined Busterburger to avoid a car crash.

The students are disheartened that they will flunk out, but Russell gives a pep talk that there is no way they cannot handle being franchise owners after these mishaps, himself now having come to accept the responsibility. Lyman Vunk appears, but is oblivious to the carnage, instead noticing one of the burnt chickens is ideal for his proposed new line of chicken sandwiches. Drootin gets demoted to picking up litter when he smears food on Vunk's suit by accident, and Russell begins a relationship with Mia. The film ends with Russell and his fellow students graduating from Busterburger University, where the funk singer ends the closing ceremony with his version of the company theme song.

On Metacritic the film has a weighted average score of 15 out of 100, based on 4 critics, indicating "Overwhelming dislike".[3]

• Leigh McCloskey as Russell Proco
• Dick Butkus as Drootin
• Randi Brooks as Mrs. Vunk
• Jack Blessing as Nacio Herb Ziper
• Chuck McCann as Dr. Mole
• Sandy Hackett as Fred Domino
• Charles Tyner as Lyman Vunk
• Debra Blee as Mia Vunk
• John William Young as Perstopopnick
• Barbra Whinnery as Sister Sara
• Sarah Abrell as Counter Girl
• Peggy Rea as Mrs. Cratchmatter
• Robert Lee Minor as Officer Rigney
• Bob Drew as Bus Driver
• Rob Paulsen, Steve Conte, Jim Jackman, Peter Georgilas and Jon Lovitz as Security Guards

• Hamburger: The Motion Picture at IMDb
• Hamburger: The Motion Picture at AllMovie
• Hamburger: The Motion Picture at Rotten Tomatoes