Memories of the Irish-Israeli War

Memories of the Irish-Israeli War is a 1995 novel by Phil O'Brien, a pen name for former Cruella de Ville frontwoman Philomena Muinzer derived from her mother's maiden name. The novel, told from the point of view of a waitress from Belfast who calls herself "Poisoner" or "Mad Dog Me", is about a group of illegal Middle Eastern workers calling themselves the "Night Shift", "the Sons of Sheikh Zubair," and "the Sons of Umm Muhammad", at a kebab shop, the Cholman Deli in Leicester Square, who commit acts of terrorism because they desire and have been unable to get British citizenship. Angry about how easily she can get a work visa, being from Ireland, she is treated as a whore by her co-workers, and usually known to them as "the slag".

Poisoner steals a rock of plutonium called the Stone of Scone and hides it in an intimate part of her body. This theft helps draw attention to the restaurant.

The book is written in thick Irish dialect and slang, with long compound-complex sentences and lengthy observations and metaphors by its narrator, who can rarely get in a word with the others, and when she does, she rarely displays the intelligence she shows in the narration, speaking in short, inutile blips in even thicker slang.

Sheikh Zubair is ultimately mentioned as being from Stratford-Upon-Avon. The book ends with Ilan married to Zeev's mother and a lengthy sex scene between Zeev and Mad Dog Me.