No Children

"No Children" is a 2002 song by American band the Mountain Goats from their album Tallahassee, about a married couple who hate each other. Songwriter John Darnielle said that he is "not laughing with (the characters in the song)" but rather "laughing at them".[1]

"No Children"
Song by The Mountain Goats
from the album Tallahassee
Released2002 (2002)
Songwriter(s)John Darnielle
Music video
"No Children" on YouTube

Composition and recording

"No Children" was written by John Darnielle for the album Tallahassee, a concept album about the troubled relationship of the "Alpha Couple."[2]

The track contains a piano line played by Franklin Bruno. Live renditions feature drums played by Jon Wurster in 6/8 time.[2]

Reception

The A.V. Club stated that it is "the most cheerful song you'll ever hear about two people who would kill each other if they could just work up the energy to do it".[3] Pitchfork Media noted its "bright piano line" and its "delightfully/horrifically bitter singalong chorus";[4] similarly, The Quietus cited it as an example of Darnielle's ability to "somehow remain uplifting despite oppressively heavy lyrics".[5]

Stephen Thompson has called it "one of (his) favorite songs of all time", while emphasizing that it is one of the least appropriate songs to play at a wedding.[6] Stereogum observed that it has become a "shoutalong favorite" at live performances.[7]

Orlando Weekly described it as an "unforgettably brutal anthem",[8] while Deadspin praised it as a "gripping standout" (among the songs on Tallahassee).[9]

Legacy

"No Children" has become a staple of Mountain Goats sets, often with the audience singing along. In 2018, the song was covered live by Julien Baker; Darnielle said that this was "the best version of the song," praising her tenderness.[2]

In 2008, the song was featured as the opening and closing theme on the premiere of the third and final season of Moral Orel on the episode "Numb", in which the song plays when Clay and Bloberta grow to be more disinterested with each other as they sleep in separate beds.[10] It also features in the 2019 series finale of You're the Worst.[11]

References
  1. Spitznagel, Eric (May 25, 2011). "Q&A: The Mountain Goats' John Darnielle". MTV. Retrieved July 8, 2019.
  2. Tyler-Ameen, David (October 10, 2018). "I Hope We Both Die: How The Mountain Goats Wrote The Ultimate Anthem To Dysfunction". NPR. Retrieved October 17, 2020.
  3. VanDerWerff, Emily Todd (May 8, 2014). "Unlocking the literate lyrics and wonderful melodies of The Mountain Goats". The A.V. Club. Retrieved July 8, 2019.
  4. Mitchum, Rob (December 15, 2002). "The Mountain Goats: Tallahassee". Pitchfork Media. Retrieved July 8, 2019.
  5. Realities & Fictions: The Mountain Goats' John Darnielle Interviewed, by Erin Lyndal Martin, at The Quietus ; published January 16, 2013; retrieved July 8, 2019
  6. The Good Listener: Can I Ruin My Wedding By Playing The Wrong Song?, by Stephen Thompson, at National Public Radio; published May 9, 2014; retrieved July 8, 2019
  7. Mountain Goats Albums from Worst to Best: Tallahassee, by Brad Shoup, at Stereogum; published December 6, 2012; retrieved July 8, 2019
  8. The Mountain Goats make the personal public at the Beacham, by Erin Sullivan, in Orlando Weekly; published October 7, 2015; retrieved July 8, 2019
  9. Q&A: The Mountain Goats' John Darnielle On Pro Wrestling's Arty Allure, by Ned Raggett, at Deadspin; published April 9, 2015; retrieved July 8, 2019
  10. Lawrence, Joseph (September 3, 2018). "Moral Orel Soundtrack: The Music Behind Moral Orel". Spinditty. Retrieved December 12, 2019.
  11. Chaney, Jen (3 April 2019). "You're the Worst Nailed a Simply Perfect Finale". Vulture. Retrieved 20 March 2020.
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