My Man (Tamar Braxton song)

Tamar Braxton (pictured in 2013) wrote "My Man" about her parents' divorce and one of her past relationships.

Tamar Braxton co-wrote "My Man" with Cory Rooney for her fifth studio album Bluebird of Happiness (2017).[1] The song was produced by Bob Robinson Jr.,[1] who worked with Braxton on her eponymous debut album (2000).[2] Braxton based "My Man" on her parents' marriage and their divorce following her father's infidelity.[3][4] While developing the lyrics, she imagined her mother's perspective to convey her emotions "as a woman and not just as [a] mom".[3] Additional inspiration came from a past relationships that caused her to question her self-worth. According to Braxton, the single was developed and recorded quickly; she explained that it "just rolled out of me".[5] She identified "My Man" as her most personal song,[6] and said the single and overall album was "the first time you see an X-ray vision of Tamar and everything I've been through".[5]

Prior to the song's release, Braxton had played it for her father, whom she told that she had forgiven for his past affair. He was initially flattered that she wrote a song about him, although he did not pay attention to the lyrics.[4] "My Man" premiered on an episode of the reality television series Braxton Family Values in late April 2017.[5] In Entertainment Tonight, Latifah Muhammad said Braxton's frank discussion about her parents' divorce and her current relationship with them showed how the Braxton family include "some tough moments on camera for their reality show".[4]

Braxton released "My Man" on April 27, 2017 as the album's lead single[5][7] for digital download[7][8] and streaming.[9][10] The single was sent to urban radio stations on July 18, 2017.[11] It was the only Bluebird of Happiness song to be marked for explicit content.[1] "My Man" was the first song from Braxton's independent record label, which she created in partnership with eOne Entertainment.[5] She left Epic Records, which released three of her albums, to have more control over her career.[12][13] When discussing this switch, Braxton said she was happy about not having to "sell people on things that I want to do".[3] For the release of "My Man", Braxton named her label Tamartian Land, a reference to her fans' nickname as "Tamartians".[5][14] The name changed to Logan Land for Bluebird of Happiness to convey that her son, Logan, is the center of her life.[1][15]

"My Man" is a four-minute, 11-second R&B and soul ballad,[7][16][17] performed in the style of a slow jam and a torch song.[18][19] The instrumentation includes a piano and an electric guitar.[20] In an Uproxx article, Elias Leight cited "My Man" as how R&B music uses "updates of the Southern soul sound";[16] while writing for Rolling Stone, Leight associated the single with a "long line of fraught, theatrical soul ballads".[21] SoulBounce's D-Money said the composition had a "slow R&B groove".[20] Critics felt the overall tone was sad, especially when compared to the more upbeat composition of the promotional single "Pick Me Up".[22][23]

The song's lyrics are about infidelity,[4][18] with a central message that the Los Angeles Times' Mikael Wood identified as "never trust a lonely woman with the one you love".[24] In Vibe, Da’Shan Smith remarked that the lyrics are "suspiciously auto-biographical" for Braxton.[25] The chorus, "I don't want to hear no bullshit stories about my man, I just can't believe that you're with her / I just can't believe she stole my man", refers to an affair, and according to D-Money, focuses on "the initial denial and eventual acceptance that her man has been stolen by another woman".[20] SoulTracks' Justin Kantor likened Braxton's voice during the first verse to her sister Toni Braxton's "rich low alto". For the lyrics, “Is this my life? It cuts me like a knife”, Kantor described Braxton as "belting grittily on the higher end of the scale".[18]

"My Man" received a positive response from music critics. Justin Kantor commended Braxton for conveying the song's varying emotions.[18] While praising the single for its relatability, a We TV writer described it as "the next best break-up remedy since ice cream".[26] AllMusic's Andy Kellman selected "My Man" as a highlight from Bluebird of Happiness, writing that album "crest[ed] with the two-timed belter" and its final song "Empty Boxes".[27] In an article about the 60th Annual Grammy Awards nominations, Da’Shan Smith said Braxton's single was snubbed.[25]

"My Man" peaked at number three on the Adult R&B Songs Billboard chart for the week of August 19, 2017, and stayed on the chart for 22 weeks.[28] The song also reached number 21 on the Hot R&B Songs Billboard chart for the week of August 26, 2017.[29] According to the Houston Chronicle, the single was successful on adult R&B stations.[30] However, Elias Leight said while songs like "My Man" are popular on R&B radio, they are never able to crossover to be played on pop radio or in feature films.[16]

The music video for "My Man" was released on June 25, 2017. Filmed in black and white, it depicts Braxton confronting her lover and his mistress over his infidelity.[31][32] After finding her lover's hotel room, Braxton sees him in bed with another woman.[31] She pushes the mistress to the bathroom floor before confronting him, taking back her coat, and leaving the hotel. A writer from Rap-Up believed a future music video would continue the story.[32] A portion of "Blind", the second single from Bluebird of Happiness, was included at the end of the video.[33]

Braxton first performed "My Man" during a show in Houston on May 5, 2017.[34] During the BET Awards 2017 on June 25, 2017, she sang it while accompanied by a group of back-up dancers.[17] These performers were four sets of couples, who were interrupted by the arrival of the men's mistresses.[35] Braxton was also accompanied by a band,[21] but she performed the song without backing vocalists.[36] Critics praised the performance as one of the award show's highlights.[37] Mikael Wood and D-Money said that it added energy to the event,[24][35] which was criticized as having technical and pacing issues.[21][24][35] Describing Braxton as a "glorious drama queen", Elias Leight enjoyed her "series of well-honed, highly dramatic gestures"; he wrote that "the force of her stagecraft" kept the attention on her rather than the dancers.[21] In an article for Billboard, Dan Rys praised Braxton's vocals, and highlighted her mic drop as a "fitting exclamation point" to the performance.[38]

Despite this positive response, Twitter users believed Braxton was lip-syncing;[39][40] Michael Arceneaux also thought this, and jokingly asked why she kept "aggressively moving her wig like it was dipped in a fire ant bed before she glued it to her head".[41] In response to these reports, Braxton uploaded an Instagram video in which she was rehearsing the song a cappella prior to the BET performance.[40] During an appearance on the game show Hip Hop Squares, Braxton had an argument with host DeRay Davis when he joked that she had lip-synced for the BET performance.[42][43] Lil Mama, one of the episode's celebrity contestants, had informed Braxton about the joke since she did not hear it the first time.[42] In an interview with the radio show The Breakfast Club, Braxton said she is close friends with Davis, and added that Lil Mama "needs the spirit of the hush sometimes".[44]

Credits adapted from the liner notes of Bluebird of Happiness.[1]

• Songwriting – Tamar Braxton, Cory Rooney
• Production – Bob Robinson Jr.