Lesbian bed death

In the early 1980s, Philip Blumstein and Pepper Schwartz conducted a survey on American relationships, sponsored by the Russell Sage Foundation and the National Science Foundation. The questionnaire covered various aspects of their relationship such as work, sex, children, finances, and decision-making. Initially 12,000 volunteer couples, including 788 lesbian couples, filled out questionnaires. Of these, 300 couples in Seattle, San Francisco, and New York were selected for a more in-depth interview. The findings were published in 1983 as American Couple: Money, Work, Sex. Among the results, Blumstein and Schwartz concluded that lesbian couples in committed relationships have less sex than any other type of couple (heterosexual married, heterosexual co-habitating or gay male) and that they generally experience less sexual intimacy the longer the relationship lasts.[4][12]

This was based on responses to the question "About how often during the last year have you and your partner had sex relations?" The results signified less sexual activity than their counterparts. Only about one-third of lesbians in relationships of 2 years or longer had sex once a week or more; 47% of lesbians in long-term relationships had sex once a month or less, and among heterosexual married couples, only 15% had sex once a week or less. They also reported that lesbians seemed to be more limited in the range of their sexual techniques than did other couples, and that lesbian couples are less sexual as couples and as individuals than anyone else.[13][14]

A 1988 study of over 1,500 lesbians found that 78% had been celibate at one time; 35% reported having been celibate for 1–5 years and 6% reported having been celibate for more than 6 years.[15][16]

In her New York Times review of American Couple, Carol Tavris suggested potential bias in the Blumstein and Schwartz survey results, as most of the respondents were typically white, affluent, liberal, and well-educated.[12] Lesbian feminist theorist Marilyn Frye also criticized the study. Frye questioned the methodology of the survey format, feeling that the survey question is too ambiguous when applied to the sexual behavior of lesbian couples. She indicated that the survey's comparison is not accurate because the focus on sexual activity back then was on whether or not a penis was inserted and if "sex relations" is interpreted too narrowly, this ambiguity could account for the finding of a statistically low frequency of sexual behavior among lesbian couples.[13][14] Frye stated, "...What 85 percent of long-term, married couples do more than once a month takes on average 8 minutes to do... What we (lesbians) do that, on average, we do considerably less frequently, takes, on the average, considerably more than 8 minutes to do. Maybe about 30 minutes at least."[14]

Lesbian couples are expected to seek sex less frequently than heterosexual or gay male couples.[17] Scholar Waguih William IsHak stated that although lesbian bed death lacks scientific evidence, empirical data has suggested "that women ha[ve] less sexual desire than men and are more submissive in sexual interactions".[3]

With regard to women's overall sexual behavior and sexual satisfaction, Masters and Johnson's 1979 study on lesbian sexual practices concluded that lesbian sexual behaviors more often have qualities associated with sexual satisfaction than their heterosexual counterparts, focusing on more full-body sexual contact rather than genital-focused contact, less preoccupation or anxiety about achieving orgasm, more sexual assertiveness and communication about sexual needs, longer lasting sexual encounters and greater satisfaction with the overall quality of one's sexual life.[13][14] 2004 research by Margaret Nichols found slightly less sexual behavior among lesbians than heterosexual women, but that both were sexually active approximately once a week.[7][16] Several studies have indicated that lesbians have orgasms more often and more easily in sexual interactions than heterosexual women do,[18] while a 2009 Journal of Sex Research study found that women in same-sex relationships enjoyed identical sexual desire, sexual communication, sexual satisfaction, and satisfaction with orgasm as their heterosexual counterparts.[19] 2014 research by Blair and Pukall reported that women in same-sex relationships have similar levels of overall sexual satisfaction as their heterosexual counterparts, and slightly lower levels of sexual frequency, but also that women in same-sex relationships spend significantly longer amounts of time on individual sexual encounters, often spending upwards of two hours on an individual encounter.[20]

Researchers Cohen and Byers stated that the majority of the lesbian bed research is old (by more than 20 years) and that its survey question "how often do you have sex?" is phallocentric and therefore the respondents were unlikely to include behaviors such as genital touching, oral-genital contact, and non-genital activities (such as kissing and whole-body contact) in their answers.[7] In their 2014 study of the concept, approximately 600 women in long-term same-sex relationships were included. Three quarters had engaged in one or more genitally-based sexual activities at least once a week during the past month, and 88% of the women reported daily non-genital sexual activity. Both heterosexual and female same-sex couples had a decrease in frequency of genital contact, while non-genital contact had not decreased. The women in same-sex relationships also reported being sexually satisfied.[7]

Suzanne Iasenza described the lesbian bed death concept as a "notorious drop-off in sexual activity about two years into long-term lesbian relationships".[2][3] Reviewing the literature on topic, she argued that the concept should end because it relies on gender socialization theory, lacks definitional clarity and empirical validity, and because all long-term couples experience a decline in sexual frequency as the years go on.[21] She also stated that a 1995 Advocate Survey of Lesbian Sexuality and Relationships showed that lesbian women had more enjoyable sex than most American women, but that this data did not receive the same attention as Schwartz's study.[14]