Dunglish

Errors often occur because of the false friend or false cognate possibility: words are incorrectly translated for understandable reasons. Examples are:

• Former prime minister Joop den Uyl once remarked that "the Dutch are a nation of undertakers". The Dutch verb ondernemen is literally the English to undertake (as onder is under, and nemen is take). The noun ondernemer is thus literally undertaker; however the idiomatic English usage is instead the French loanword entrepreneur.[4] (Dutch uses the more specific begrafenisondernemer for a funeral director.)
• Former prime minister Pieter Sjoerds Gerbrandy had a meeting with Winston Churchill in London. Gerbrandy entered the room and shook Churchill's hand, saying: "Good-day!" Churchill responded: "This is the shortest meeting I have ever had". Gerbrandy had looked up the English translation of goedendag, which in Dutch is often used as a formal greeting, yet "good day" is most often used as valediction in Britain (as opposed to "good morning" or "good afternoon").
• The Dutch word "actueel" means "current" (whereas "actual" in English means "genuine"). A Dutch person unfamiliar with the English word might therefore be confused if he or she were asked about the "actual time" an appointment was supposed to start, or might misuse the word him/herself.
• The Dutch verb solliciteren means to apply for a job, which can lead to an embarrassing situation if someone claims that they have come to solicit.
• The word eventueel in Dutch means potentially (like éventuel in French, eventuell in German, eventual in Spanish, eventuale in Italian, eventual in Portuguese, eventuell in Swedish) and not eventually, which is uiteindelijk in Dutch. This mistake caused a row between the Scottish and Belgian football associations when the Belgian football association invited delegates from various associations over for the "eventual qualification of the Belgian national football team" before the play-offs against Scotland started. While the Scottish federation accused the Belgians of sheer arrogance, the Belgian association had actually meant to hold the event after a "possible qualification".[4]

Two typical Dutch mistakes in English – wrong order for noun adjuncts ("meeting point caves" instead of "Meeting point for caves" or "Cave meeting point") and compound nouns written as one word ("meetingpoint")

Some Dutch speakers may use Dutch syntax inappropriately when using English, creating irregularities such as What mean you? instead of What do you mean? However, note that older English used "what say you?" for "what do you say?".

This is because English and Dutch do not follow exactly the same word order. English has a subject–verb–object word order, but this is shared only partially by Dutch, which has a verb-second order, causing the subject to follow the verb if another constituent already precedes it; e.g., Hij is daar ("He is there"), but Daar is hij; literally "There is he" (idiomatically, "There he is").

Also, Dutch places perfect participles towards the end of a clause while the auxiliary remains at the verb-second position, allowing for the two to be separated and for many other elements to stand in between; e.g. Ik heb dat gisteren [meteen na de lunch toen ik aankwam etc.] gedaan; literally "I have that yesterday [immediately after the lunch when I arrived etc.] done".

In questions, English employs periphrastic constructions involving the verb to do, a rare feature crosslinguistically. Dutch does not use this construction, but instead utilizes a VSO word order, inverting the subject and verb.

In English noun adjuncts, such as Schiphol in the phrase Schiphol Meeting Point, the modifying noun comes before the other noun. In Dutch this is the reverse, giving rise to errors like "Meeting Point Schiphol".

Dutch compound noun error in English "boardingpass" instead of "boarding pass", as seen on KLM sign at Schiphol Airport, 2013

In English, only certain compound nouns (such as "schoolteacher") can be written as one word, whereas in Dutch the default is to write compound nouns as a single word.[5] This is witnessed in errors in English texts on signs – at Schiphol Airport alone one can see signs for "meetingpoint", "boardingpass" and "traintickets". In some cases the English compound noun spelled as two words in English has been officially absorbed by the Dutch language – as is the case with creditcard (credit card) and jetlag (jet lag).

English and Dutch are both West Germanic languages, with many cognate verbs with identical or nearly identical meanings. This similarity between verbs may cause speakers of Dutch to conjugate English verbs according to Dutch grammar.

• We kissen her. (Dutch kussen means and is cognate with English to kiss. In Dutch grammar, verbs with plural subjects take a form identical to the infinitive, which in most cases has an en suffix.)
• What do you now? for What are you doing right now? (In Dutch, Wat doe je nu?)
• How goes it now? for How are you doing now? (The phrase is used particularly after someone has had a bad spell. A similarly constructed phrase is found in Shakespeare (Othello, Act 4, Scene 3), carrying a slightly different meaning, which underlines the even closer similarities between English and Dutch historically.)

• Words like third and the are commonly mispronounced by Dutch speakers as turd and duh, replacing the dental fricative consonants that are not present in Dutch with dental plosives, the nearest equivalent.
• Many Dutch speakers have trouble distinguishing between bat, bad, bet and bed or between back, bag, beck and beg for that reason. This is because Dutch devoices obstruents at the end of a word, and also because Dutch does not distinguish between [æ] and [ɛ].
• Some pronounce the word idea (in Dutch: idee) without the ending sound, making "Do you have an idea?" and "Do you have an ID?" sound the same.
• Most Dutch speakers do not voice the English v (that is, their vocal cords do not vibrate when they say it). In English, the labiodental fricative is "f" when unvoiced and "v" when voiced. In the modern Northern Standard Dialect of Dutch, "v" is often devoiced. This is particularly obvious when "v" begins a word. For example, many Dutch would pronounce video as /ˈfɪdiəʊ/, instead of /ˈvɪdiəʊ/, or van as /fæn/, instead of /væn/.

• Using "greetings" to close a letter. Caused by the literal translation of "(met vriendelijke) groeten" (reinforced by the German "(mit freundlichen) Grüßen)". In English, a greeting typically refers to the beginning of any type of exchange.
• Using the possessive form without a determiner. For example, "the Lamborghini of Patrick" instead of "Patrick's Lamborghini", or "the computer of her" instead of "her computer."
• Use of apostrophes to indicate plural nouns. "car's" instead of "cars."

• A 2009 Dutch TV ad by the Eneco utility, promoting wind energy, poked fun at the Dutch people's tendency to speak Dunglish.[6]
• Make that the cat wise, originally started as a Facebook group poking fun at bad English translations by mock translating Dutch sayings, deliberately sticking to Dutch word order and use words that are homonyms in Dutch but not in English, thus creating English sentences that make no sense to native English speakers. The title "Make that the cat wise" is a mock translation of the Dutch saying "Maak dat de kat wijs" (try to convince the cat, i.e. don't try to fool me).[7] The publisher also sells calendars and agendas with this theme.

Dutch author Maarten H. Rijkens has written two books on the subject for Dutch readers: I always get my sin and We always get our sin too.[8]

• Non-native pronunciations of English